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I don't bite

messed up today and had pizza,
im fasting till tuesday nite when il have  a salad cuz im seeing my dad for dinner,

this is pathetic iv gained like 9lbs since july,
thats alot,

feeling very very stupid and desperate,
life sucks inside my head.

I dont feel christmassy at all this year.
ha maybe im getting old!

Anyhoo i stayed at home 2nite so i wouldnt be tempted to drink if i was in a bar. Plus i really feel like i was chasing people for their time this month. Im always way to available for other people.
Besides i feel way better staying in, i know i would hav been all anxious if id gone out.
Cant handle the pints, binge afterwards, possible bringing it back up and the horrible remorse the next morning.

But it is christmas and im getting loads of exercise with working everyday.

weight update 2moro!